Everyone experiences grief differently; no two people will grieve the same. This can make it difficult to fully understand how others are feeling and how much their loss is affecting them.

There are five stages of grief:

Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

These can be felt in any order and at any time and sometimes all at once and can often make a person feel out of control and unable to cope.

People sometimes say they feel like they are going mad. They can find it difficult to make simple decisions and lack trust their own judgement.

Reassurance that their reactions and feeling are usual responses to grief can be helpful alongside some understanding of why they are reacting the way can be helpful in the processing of grief.

When someone has recently died most people understand that the bereaved person will struggle and be upset. Unfortunately, all to often, understanding wears thin a few months down the line. This can be the time when support is needed the most. The reality and devastating impact of the loss of a loved one can have a ripple affect into many areas of a person’s life. These affects are known as secondary losses.

Grief is a normal reaction to the loss of someone you love and feeling tearful, depressed, angry or frustrated are all usual reaction.

The kindest thing you can do is to allow yourself to feel your grief.

If we suppress feeling they will invariably resurface at some point in the future. If you can imagine suppressing feeling as putting them into a box and sealing it. The box will eventually get too full and bursts open. The affects of this can feel more traumatic than if you allow yourself to gently ride the grief rollercoaster.

It is also okay to still enjoy yourself as much as it is okay to feel sad or be tearful. Giving yourself permission to be as you need to be is the best gift you can give yourself.