How can I help someone who is grieving?

How can I help someone who is grieving?

Knowing how to help a grieving friend or relative can be difficult. If you know someone who is grieving, try and stay in touch. Letting them know that you are thinking of them, whether it is from a distance or close by can make all the difference. If someone you care about has lost a loved one, you can help them through the grieving process.

  • Stay in touch – Share their sorrow. Allow them, even encourage them to talk about their feelings of loss and share memories of their loved one
  • Research local services – Are there any services in your local area that may help them practically and emotionally?
  • Do not offer false comfortIt does not help the grieving person when you say, “it was for the best” or “you’ll get over it in time.” Instead, offer an empathic ear and take time to listen.
  • Offer practical help – Babysitting, cooking, helping with daily jobs are all ways to help someone who is in the midst of grieving.
  • Be patientRemember that it can take a long time to recover from a major loss. Try and make yourself available to talk.
  • Encourage professional help when necessaryDo not hesitate to recommend professional help when you feel someone is experiencing too much pain to cope alone, you may need to research this with them.
  • Ask how they are feeling – Each day can be different for someone who is grieving; take the time to listen and understand what they are going through.  
  • Talk about everyday life too – Their loss and grief does not have to be the focus of all your conversations. 
  • Talk about the person who died – Sharing memories of their loved one can really support the grieving process.

Do not forget to look after yourself when you are support someone who is grieving.

Some useful organisations for further information and help:

The Bereavement Advice Centre

British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP)
Find a professionally qualified counsellor in your local area.

Age UK

Bodie Hodges Foundation – Supporting families bereaved of a child

At G Seller we offer bereavement support to all of the families we take care of as part of our complete service. For more information please visit our Bereavement Support page.

An Iconic Poem Of Remembrance

In early May 1915, shortly after losing a friend in Ypres during World War 1, a Canadian doctor, Lt Col John McCrae was inspired by the sight of poppies that were growing in the bleak and battered landscape of war to write a now famous poem called ‘In Flanders Fields’.

It has become a poem that is symbolic of remembrance the world over…


In Flanders’ fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place: and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders’ fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe;
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high,
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders’ Fields.

Service Of Reflection 2020

The Family of G. Seller would like to warmly invite you and your family to join us for our Service of Reflection, which we have arranged to remember loved ones that we have been privileged to take care of.

The Service will take place on Friday 27th November at 7:00pm online due to the prevailing restrictions on gathering due to the pandemic.

Amy Barsby, Director of G. Seller & Co. Ltd, said, “It is a privilege to work in our family business and to continue to serve the local community, as we have done for over 100 years. The Service Of Reflection is an opportunity for us to show support for the friends and families of the loved ones that we have taken care of and something that resonates at the heart of all that we do.”

Find out more about the evening here

Local Leicester Lockdown

With the ongoing challenges associated with the Coronavirus pandemic the eyes of the UK are now on Leicester as it becomes the latest hotspot and the first area of the UK to be the focus on additional local lockdown measures.

As with any significant changes there can be ramifications for those organising a funeral for a loved one.  As Joseph Barsby, Managing Director of G Seller explains, “We will need to pay close attention to developments as they could result in changes to practices at cremaoriums and cemeteries.  At the present time Hinckley is not affected but the situation continues to evolve and we need to be aware of the implications of any changes too.”

As Joseph adds, “If anyone has any concerns they should speak to their personally appointed funeral director who will be able to advise them about the situation and address any worries that they may have.”

Full details of the area covered under lockdown have yet to be released but the BBC website has an updated news piece on the situation here

Return To Happiness

Here at G Seller we like to refresh our window displays on a regular basis, sharing thoughts with the community on themes that resonate with us. For this summer we have dressed the window with the use of Lily of the Valley which are known as the ‘return to happiness’ flower which we felt was really appropriate at the current time. Calla Lillies have also been used to add colour to the display.

The Lily of the Valley is the birth flower of the month of May and also links directly to The May Chapel, the Chapel of Rest that we named in memory of the Auntie of our Operations Director, Rhonda Astil. For Rhonda her Auntie was the inspiration and driving impetus behind her entering the funeral profession, a profession that she has devoted herself too for over 30 years.

The Calla Lily also has a poignant yet relevant message, to ‘focus on the beauty around us and to remember that it will return, even if it does disappear for a season.’

As Joseph Barsby, third generation Managing Director of G. Seller explains, “2020 has not been the best year for many people and their businesses and as the pandemic seems to be easing and the nation starts to come out of lockdown, Lily of the Valley seemed truly significant as we all seek something of a new normal and a ‘return to happiness.’ As a family business our staff are integral to who we are and what we do and the fact that these flowers have a personal significance to Rhonda makes them seem even more appropriate too.”

“Many of us have spent the past couple of months reflecting on our lives and what is really important to us and the Calla Lily really provides a real beacon of hope as the summer takes hold and we can all focus on the real beauty around us and look to the future, remembering that the good times will return once more,” concludes Joseph.

Homage To The War Generation

Our Hinckley based family business was proud to celebrate VE Day with a beautiful musical tribute.

Last week saw the 75th anniversary of the end of World War II across Europe and we paid tribute to remember the efforts of a generation that has enabled us to live with freedom as a result of their efforts.

As Joseph Barsby, Managing Director of G. Seller explains, “As a family business that has been around for over 100 years and with our ancestors living and serving through the War, we wanted to do something special, symbolic and memorable to make the anniversary appropriately.”

As Joseph adds, “With everything that is going on in the world at the moment the anniversary gave us all the opportunity to stop and reflect and what better way than to hear from some talented local musicians, the current generation, play tributes to the previous generation. We were witness to something truly special from Christopher Small and Eloise Berry.”

As part of the VE Day Celebration talented musician, Christopher Small played ‘We’ll Meet Again’ on the euphonium. It was a beautiful rendition for the 75th Anniversary of VE Day and he was followed by the incredible voice of Eloise Berry who performed ‘We’ll Meet Again‘ as part of the nationwide sing-a-long!

As Joseph concludes, “It was a truly beautiful way to remember the past and it is important that we do continue to pass on the message around the loss of lives and the incredible courage of individuals during the wars that have given freedom to the current generation. History should never be lost and it is important to remember. The sacrifices made by previous generations. The tributes from both Christopher and Eloise were poignant reminders of how the current generation are able to celebrate the past and continue to give life to these milestones of history in the modern world with incredible musical tributes.”

Creating Windows Of Colour In The Community

During the current pandemic we are all living in uncertain times with each new day taking us into uncharted territory. It is at times like this that community really does come to the fore and having been a family business in and around Hinckley for over 100 years, we know how strong our local community is.

As Joseph Barsby, Managing Director of G. Seller explains, “There are so many wonderful things going on in our towns and villages to help others but with so many people staying at home we wanted to do something to make a difference, to celebrate our local heroes and to show them that there is a lot of love for what they are doing to help protect and save lives, from those on the front line at hospitals to essential workers providing food to the supermarkets and those supporting charities to name a few.”

“The children of our staff have already been creating pictures that are now proudly on display within our windows in Hinckley but we wanted to do more and get more people involved. To that end, with community spirit and support in mind, we have created some templates that can be downloaded, coloured in and displayed in windows around our towns and villages.”

The aim of this community campaign is to create ‘windows of colour’ and a ‘showcase of support’ to cheer up those key workers as they drive past on their way to another shift, or on their way home.

As Joseph adds, “There is so much support within the community for everyone that is helping to make a difference and fight the virus and what better way to show that love and support than windows of colour and appreciation. We know our community and the people within it really do pull together at times of need and we wanted to do something to make a difference. It will be uplifting for everyone to see the pictures too.”

People are also being encouraged to shared their images on social media using the hashtags #WeCare and #ProudofAllOurHeroes.

As Joseph concludes, “It is important that we come together as a community and thank those that are making a difference. I would also like to add that I am immensely proud of our team who are continuing to act with compassion and pride working with families at their time of need to and for them to know that they too are making a difference each and every day. This campaign enables us to show support for everyone making a difference and it is also a great opportunity to ‘spread some colour across our town’ too. We look forward to seeing the collection of pictures grow on social media.”

Download one of the three templates, colour them in and put them proudly on display in your window for everyone to see. Let’s spread some colour and show people how much we all care.

There are three templates to choose from with the headings; Our NHS Heroes, Thanking Our Key Workers and Proud of Hinckley’s Heroes.

We look forward to seeing lots of coloured in pictures proudly displayed in windows throughout Leicestershire!

Thanking Our NHS Heroes

Here at G. Seller we wanted to show our support and are now delighted to be proudly displaying our children’s rainbow drawings, showing our support to the NHS in our windows.

As Joseph Barsby, Managing Director adds, “We are living in unprecedented times and it is important for the whole community to come together. Those working within the NHS are doing a fantastic job and we wanted to show them how much it is appreciated. It may be a small gestures but well done to Alexa, Alfie, Chloe, Megan, Hayley, Kurtis & Angelina for sharing their rainbow pictures which are proudly on display in our windows which we hope will show how much we care to those working on behalf of our community as they pass by.”

#Community #SupportNHS #StayHomeSaveLives

Join Our Team…

G. Seller are seeking an experienced full time Financial Controller to join our team. We are an independent, family owned Funeral Directors & Memorial Masons, that has been established since 1910 and are dedicated to providing the highest levels of bereavement care.

The financial controller is an integral part of the day to day running of our company, working alongside the full and part time team. The hours are 8:30am – 5:00pm, Monday to Friday.

Essential competencies:

High level of aptitude for Sage 50 accounts, desktop including:

  • Reconciling the bank
  • Sales & Purchase Ledger
  • Providing the monthly management accounts

The ideal person will be:

  • A person of absolute integrity
  • Someone who completes every task they undertake to the best of their ability, always giving 100%
  • A compassionate, sympathetic individual who is sensitive to the needs of bereaved families, their colleagues and all those they meet.
  • A good communicator, listener and dynamic team player
  • Be responsible for a high standard of personal appearance, speech and conduct
  • Someone who pays attention to detail
  • A flexible attitude to working hours
  • Honest, professional, dependable & self-motivated
  • Uniform will be provided and further development in the business can be attained if you are have the right attitude.

Job Type: Full-time, Permanent
Salary: £18,000 to £22,000 a year
Experience: Accounting: 2 years (Preferred)

Find out more about the position and apply online here

Service Recognition For Joe

As a business we are fortunate to have some fantastic staff who work with us and it is always great to be able to recognise their endeavours. Today we recognise a real achievement by our dedicated Funeral Director, Joe Clarke-Ferridge who is presented with his 10 year service award.

As Joseph Barsby, Managing Director at G. Seller explains, “Commitment, loyalty and compassion are the foundations of how we look after the families that we are privileged to serve,something that Joe continues to epitomise on a daily basis.”

“Joe is an important member of our team, our family, and it is a real pleasure to be able to recognise his contribution, to our business and the broader community. As part of this recognition he has received a thank you letter, a gift card of his choosing and a bespoke long service lapel pin.”

As Joseph concludes, “It is a pleasure to recognise Joe for his contribution in this way. He is a real asset to our business and we look forward to working with him for many more years to come.”